Robert De Niro was recently in a movie with me. It’s called The Killer Elite, loosely based on the book by Sir Ranulph Fiennes and his time with the SAS. A Big Budget Car Crashing movie – it has, unfortunately, not impressed the critics, despite the fact that both Mr De Niro and myself are method trained actors. I presume, therefore that this critical chagrin is a result of the fact that all those wonderful close-ups of your humble narrator ended up on the cutting room floor. Of course I look good, which is all that matters. The remaining short line (I say ‘Go on you cheeky bugger!’) and appearance of my face can be viewed at 22minutes and 15 seconds into the film. It’s out on video to buy now, which of course is your decision. However it is not incumbent upon you, dear reader, to poise your finger over the ffwd button or purchase anything, as I have generously extracted the best scene right here for your enjoyment. Meantime, I’ll get back to my real work; as a vague somnambulist, stumbling from paragraph to paragraph.
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